Who Am I??

Delhi->hyd->Pune, India
An environmental engg turned Software Engg working for a MNC. U cn call me Peenuts..thats what my long lost frend used 2 call me, and its in his memory.

11/15/07

Feeling scared!!!!!

Same time last year my life was full of despair, there seemed to be no hope and I had even thought of suicide.......

Same time this year, i feel life cudnt have been better, hav been enjoyin life and doing things i always wanted to...in short i am luvin life......par this year is abt to end......and the uncertainity of how the next year wl b is scaring the shit out of me...wht if its as hellish as last year...meri to sahi main watt lag jayegi....i know i cant run away and hav 2 face things come wht may.......par bas ...not feelin comfortable.....this is one of the rare moments when i dont feel like welcoming th year ahead...wish that time wud come 2 a standstill....

Also going through a lot of internal conflicts for past few days, so i went to the roof top at 12 in the nite...the breeze ws very pleasant...just sat there lookin at the stars..........tried to free my mind, let myself loose..it helped a bit...resolved some of the conflicts but still cant stop worrying....ek to meri higher studies ka kya hoga kuch samajh nahi aa raaha......cat story is as miserable as it ws last year........is baar nahi hua to i dont think i wl hav the patience ever again...i hav already spent a lot of time on it.....

I am leavin for home this 24th but really dont feel like going....... papa wl ask abt career plans..hav no answer...mom wl ask abt personal life plans..hav no answer to them either...

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...dimag satak raha hai!!!!!

4 comments:

KP said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
KP said...

i agree...i get same line of questioning day in & day out....njoy the life...dont think too much...tings will happen when it has to....

Aditi aka Jiggs said...

ehyaa
nice blog
thnks

cheers

Reeta Skeeter said...

Hota hai hota hai... time will give you your answers as well as everybody's...till then live life as if whatever you gotta do has to be done today itself and cheer up..Life's Good!

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